Hospital

A good friend of mine's eleven year old brother has been in the hospital for the past week so I decided to go visit him yesterday. I was not prepared for what I saw and experienced there. My heart broke immediately when we arrived. It was weird because I see sick kids and people everyday when i am in Kibera but this day, I wanted to weep when I saw the physical state of the children and adults alike. My friend Abby took me on a tour of the hospital. We walked down the children's ward where she said that up to three people will sleep in a bed at a time. She told me how people will arrive at the front of the hospital at 6am and wait in line hoping to get a place where they can get treated...often times they are turned away. My tour continued as we walked down the HIV/AIDS ward, one side for women, one side for men. Some of the patience were literally skin and bones...I have never seen anything like it...I smiled at them as they watched the only white person in the hospital walk by...I felt so small because I felt like they felt like they were on display...I wanted to run inside and hug them all...or fall on my knees and cry. There have been many times that I have wished I was anything but white because of how i have been treated, but I have never wanted to blend in more than i did that day! Throughout the visit, my friend would say, "Mikey (her brother) will be so happy that a Mzungu (white person) has come to visit him." I know she was half-way joking but it gets really old when you can't just be looked at for who you are. Even though you are put on an invisible pedestal, you really feel so small because your value seems to lay in the color of your skin...It is something that I battle with at times but i know that I can't live feeling like that because then you would always have a guard up and not let yourself be loved or love others.

Though yesterday was a tough day I was also blessed beyond reason as I watched my friends' family come together and fight for one another. It was amzing to see every generation there at the hospital caring for eachother as they all cared for Mikey. Abby's sister, Ann, had been staying with Mikey the whole week, sleeping in the same bed as him and staying awake all night doing whatever he needed in order to be comfortable and keeping his fever down. Abby said that even the nurses do not care! She said that when they arrived they just put Mikey on a bed with no blankets or anything. The family asked the nurses for a blanket and the nurses said it was not their concern! That broke my heart. It was beautiful seeing everyone gather around and praying for Mikey. It was sad though because there was this Mama and her sick one year old boy in the bed next to Mikey who had been there for 2 months and no had ever come to visit them! Abby and our friend Hyda talked about taking time to come and visit these people who do not have anyone. They want to bring them mangos and spend time just being with them. That impressed me so much and I really want to do it with them!

We are so thankful that Mikey is doing so much better! Hopefully he will be home soon. This entry may seem disjointed and for that i apologize but i wanted to be transparent about what has been going on in my heart lately!

And, just for fun, I wanted to include some pictures of my friends and I at this wedding we were able to attend last weekend. They are all short-term missionaries that are serving all over Kenya.